Dream a little dream

We're being featured on A Practical Wedding tomorrow today and as soon I received notification, I immediately said "Oh shoot! CNN just covered this website, there will be mass traffic in the next few days, and I'm not as seasoned in blogging as I once was. Must write something ASAP!" I've had a few ideas spinning in my head lately, particularly about following your dreams within a relationship, even when they're not your dreams. When do you do decide to follow these dreams, you may have to take a big leap of faith leaving behind jobs, family, friends and the normal routine to which you and your partner have been accustomed. I'll try to condense and clarify my rambling so this is easier to digest.

Leaving your job - Andy had been offered a position that included working in his dream career field, a move 2 1/2 hours away, and a significant pay cut. As he told his future employer that he'd jump in the car to interview, the wheels in my head were turning more quickly than I anticipated. I knew that we could potentially be moving away, Andy could leave his dull production job, and we could potentially get closer to creating our family (yes, we think that far ahead). What I didn't think about until he was offered the position (a mere 4 hours later) was that I would have to quit my job; not necessarily my dream job, but a job which I'd enjoyed for the entire duration, in a field that always brought excitement, positive and easy to embrace changes, and numerous chances for my skills to shine. It was even harder as the tears in my eyes began to well up as I turned in my letter of resignation. My boss only promised to hate me 7% more each day until my last (all in good humor of course). I was told by many that I would be missed, but was always welcome to return to the agency, should we find ourselves living in the area again. That last bit helped a lot in my transition out, but the looming fear of not finding meaningful work still lingers... Tourist season is in full swing on the coast, which brings ample work serving tables or working at a hotel. Having a fun & carefree job may be in the cards for me again, which wouldn't be so bad. It would definitely give me time to delve into new volunteer work and continue to beef up my resume, while still collecting a paycheck twice a month.

Leaving your family and friends - We've lived within close proximity to our families for the last few years, always trying to make time for dinners and outings accordingly. It can and has been hard devoting our time to three sets of parents, siblings and extended family, but we've made it work. This will be our first opportunity to thrive and further develop our relationship as a married couple, without our parents just a quick drive away. My own parents moved 200 miles away shortly before I turned two years old, being away from their extended families for almost 10 years. My mom still states to this day that it was the best event that happened for their relationship. As for our friends, not all have lived close to us during our time together, but we've still tried to make the most of the sporadic visits over the last few years. Now, we'll have to learn how to cultivate new relationships together without retreating to our hermit-like nature when we're not feeling up to the challenge. We're both naturally social people, so hopefully this won't be too difficult. As for our current relationships, making a visit to the beach won't be so bad for the masses as now they'll have a free couch to crash!

Leaving your normal routine - Oh, 8am-5pm Monday - Friday, how I will miss your conformity, dependability and guaranteed two day spread of time off. I will NOT miss rush hour traffic, the 3pm lull, or the double snooze epidemic that I could never quite shake. I know that Andy will also not miss his 4:45am wake up calls or his required overtime shifts that sucked away his days off from work. But really, what is normal? When I worked as a server right after college, my normal schedule entailed working until 2am most nights and sleeping in until noon. Granted, I only had to work 30 hours/week but it didn't match what other people were doing at the time (and some often wondered when I would acquire that "real job"). I still put a lot of my extra time into volunteering, using my brain when serving and cooking didn't take the cake. With the possibility of rejoining the ranks of the service industry, it doesn't so much feel as a step back but more than a step in the direction to help my husband follow his dream. His 10 year plan ultimately involves owning his own brew pub, and the more knowledge I acquire about restaurants, management and the service industry, the better I can help him develop his own goals. Andy's never had a dream job before, so it's been hard for him to identify with the loss I've been feeling over quitting my job in the non-profit sector. When finding normal, you have to find happiness in what you do, no matter what it is. If you're going to serve tables, do the best you can and be the best server you can be. Keep it light, make it fun and continue developing your skills and passions outside of your job.

You're probably wondering what my dreams are; that's a great question! Or maybe you're thinking that I've given up a lot to follow my husband's dream; how 1950s of you, Cara! I've dreamed of becoming a doula, teacher, or continuing helping those in need on their paths to obtaining self-sufficiency. I've also dreamed of starting my own catering business or cupcakery, or even a vintage store on Etsy. I will always find a way to be an advocate, even if it's within volunteer work. And yes, giving up my job has been tough, but this adventure could potentially open up many doors for us both. We're following the yellow brick road to the coast in hopes that in taking this journey together will help ease the stress that we might encounter from time to time. In the mean time, boxes still need to be packed and we're patiently waiting to hear from our potential new landlord. For now, enjoy the view!